Toilet Politics

So I said I would do it ladies....and here it is. So what are the rules when stepping into an under-accommodating, slightly off smelling toilet? Do we use a public toilet at our convenience, or try to avoid it and put ourselves at the risk of a urinary infection at all times??? Are there certain publics restrooms that are acceptable to use (ie. the staff toilet) or does that not put us at more risk of humiliation when the inevitable No.2 will just not hang on for 5.30??? So what are some of the basics that we all know are no-go's in the public toilet system? No communication with fellow cubicles at any time Avoid any bodily noises or water splashes No singing to the PA music or talking freely on mobile phones Do not make excess toilet rolling Wash hands even when the soap dispenser is empty (usual) Wipe hands if all drying agents are unavailable (nothing worse than a wet doorknob) All flatulence left for the home environment Definately no No.2's if there is a line up, i dont care how much it wants to release But what else is unsaid but always obeyed in the restroom area. When heading in and noticing that all cubicles are filled, you wait until one is free. But then when you step in that inconsiderate person before has done the most rotten bowel cleanse you have ever smelt. A. Do you stay in there anyway and hold your breath till your lips go blue. B. Do you walk out immediately, embarass prior party and wait for the next cubicle vacancy? When stepping into said restroom and not all cubicles are filled but you pass someone just as they head out, is it social decency and personal space to head to a entirely new cubicle, or is it ok to step into their momentary turf??? If all is good and you have suitably placed yourself in that corner cubicle, how many times can you roll the toilet paper before people start to realise your not in there just to release fluids, and then how much is too much before they start thinking your laxatives must have taken effect? So business is done, what do you do first? Is it zip up then flush or the other way around??? Personally i dont see how people can stand there with their pants around their ankle and still turn around butt naked to press half or full. It is always arrange first because if there's people waiting they are hanging for that flush sound and ready to pounce. So what if someone else flushes first? Can you also and then head out at the same time as them? Or is it first in, first served. I think the suitable time frame is that wen the soap is in their hand and the waters running, your safe to make your exit. And please this is a no-go with me. If you are drying your hands and you give up half way and go to grab that doorknob, step back a second and have some consideration. Alright if you have an inpatience problem, than at least wipe them on your pants, dont coat the door with your toilet habits. With No.2's there is a debate going on, on whether you place toilet paper in the bowl first to avoid splashing sounds or aim slightly off center so it rebounds. Second option? I dont think so. No one likes the trails of your business, i'd much rather just hear you. Personally i think the first option is quite socially considerate, saves embarassment and mess. But make sure this isn't taken too far and the whole roll is down there as this will just cause a blockage, and that is the most humiliating thing possible. How can you walk away from that with dignity? But when drunk do not all these rules fly out the window??? Hell if it wasnt for the side walls giving us the support, hovering would be out of the question in such circumstances. Therefor I believe that all places serving alcohol should be forced to place disabled rails in all female toilets, come on help us out a little here! But before sounding too forward I will leave it at this and hopefully will have some feedback and maybe even something i've missed..........think about it.